Movie Reviews

Hellbenders
submitted by
Thomas
 on
Tuesday, November 11, 2014 - 17:57
3.0
Directed by: 

There are countless movies about exorcism out there but one fundamental question hasn’t been asked yet… what do you do when demons are so evil no ordinary priest can drive them back to hell? Apparently that’s where the Hellbenders come in, an elite group of exorcists living in a constant state of debauchery so that they are ready for hell at any given time. That way they can invite possession and then commit suicide so they can drag the demon to hell with them. But even this degenerate bunch is put to the test when a Norse demon called Black Surtr unleashes his evil ways in New York City.

That in short is what J.T. Petty’s Hellbenders is about… it sounds like an eighties throwback to movies like Ghostbusters where a crew of unlikely heroes gets to fight evil. But that’s as far as the comparison goes. Because while there are some halfway decent lines to be found throughout the script, they are few and far between or you get tired of them real quick. Like the gag where they introduce the sin they are about to indulge in? Funny for about 30 seconds… then right to stale.

Despite the promising premise and a committed cast, Hellbenders never really takes off. It’s as if Petty forgot to focus on the story because he was too busy trying to make the next cult classic. The result is a complete mess that I doubt anyone will enjoy and which makes movies like Bitch Slap and Machete Kills look like focused efforts.